My father was 50 after I was born. He got here from a distinct period, the place males had been males, and everybody else needed to serve them. Cleansing the home and cooking was “ladies’s work,” and since I used to be the eldest daughter, I acquired caught doing loads of family chores. Naturally, this made me resentful. I nonetheless hate home tasks to today. The worst half was the nightly dishes.
Dad had loads of different sexist concepts, however there have been different instances after I questioned if he was extra progressive than he let on. For one, he insisted I discover ways to drive as a result of he “didn’t need me to be depending on a person.” (Mother couldn’t drive.) He thought ladies ought to have their very own cash, so he inspired me to complete highschool so I might get job (his excellent place for me was secretary…which was so NOT me). He additionally had no drawback threatening my ex when he hurled a slur at me as a result of ladies must be revered by their companions.
Because the years glided by, I started to note one thing altering concerning the dynamic between my mother and father. Though he preached to me about “ladies’s work,” he began pitching in, even after working lengthy hours. Mother had well being points, so he grew to become an equal accomplice in preserving the home spic and span. No weaponized incompetence there. He cooked, cleaned, and did laundry. He would even present up at her job to assist end on days when she was dog-tired (she was the cleansing woman on the firehouse).
When Mother handed away, he did as a lot as any 90-something-year-old might. He hated being depending on anybody.
Though he nonetheless sat round speaking his Archie Bunker crap, lots of his actions contradicted these phrases. A part of me thinks he really loved “ladies’s work.” Was he a secret feminist? Or an unintentional one? Or was he only a good man beneath the gruff, tough, macho stuff?
He’s been gone for over a decade. I’m wondering how he would really feel about the best way issues are going on the earth. I feel he’d be blissful to see a feminine vice chairman, though he’d most likely have some gushy (and sexist) remarks about her attractiveness.
I additionally marvel what he would take into consideration my world. I’m fiercely unbiased and a workaholic. My husband does the dishes.
I feel Dad could be okay with that.
xo
Theresa
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October 13, 2023: E book signing at Free Spirit Crystals in Butler, Wisconsin. 7:00 PM – 8:00 PM. Come on down, say hello, get a replica of The Playing cards You’re Dealt signed, and take a look at the cool crystals in inventory.
October twenty first, 2023: E book signing at Aum Shanti in New York, NY. 12:00 PM – 2:00 PM. Meet me within the Massive Apple and get your guide signed. Yay!
What I’m Grateful For:
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A freshly painted home
Soundtrack for 9/30/23
Ladies Don’t Owe You Sh*t by Aston
© Theresa Reed | The Tarot Girl 2023
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