Each side of my disposition – even destiny, the playing cards I’ve been dealt in life – appears to be on a cusp. Astrologically by each Japanese and Western charts I’m a cusp child. Cultural id sensible, mine is the hyphenated expertise. I’m agnostic relating to occasion traces, however you’ll definitely hear the far proper calling me too woke, and the far left calling me too trad.
I’m usually too structured and austere for the artistic arts group and too delicate, too mystical-leaning for the company world. I like agendas, strategic plans, and reasonable goal-setting; I worth effectivity, utility, and productiveness, all attributes that don’t go over nicely with the artistic arts group. I additionally account for unseen influences, belief my psychic impulses, and worth empathy, compassion, mercy, softness, vulnerability, and kindness, attributes closely frowned upon within the company world.
On my social media, I just lately shared Verse 20 from the Tao Te Ching. I’ll simply excerpt a small a part of it right here:
Mastery of data abates the struggling, or is it
Ceasing pursuit of data abates the struggling—
How does one discern the primary from the second?
…
Others have a spot they belong, however I’m left behind.
… I really feel estranged at dusk.
… I alone have this coronary heart of discontent.
Like a tranquil sea, an infinite drifting wind,
they every have their function however I alone resist the movement.
For these acquainted with the TTC, hilariously even this verse is a “cusp” verse, distinctive in its construction, as a result of the implied first line is definitely the final line of Verse 19. You carry over the past line of Verse 19, proceed with the precise Verse 20, and that’s the way you get the context for that query offered: “How does one discern the primary from the second?” Is it that the extra you study and know, the extra you’re capable of curb struggling? Or is ignorance bliss, as a result of the extra you realize, the extra struggling you appear to expertise?
One thing in regards to the tone, the wording, from content material to vibes about Verse 20 has at all times caught out to me, setting it aside from the opposite TTC verses.
A recurring theme in Japanese philosophy and mysticism is concord, stability, temperance, and strolling the center path. So I ponder if Verse 20 is that this prophetic reflection on what occurs whenever you select to stroll the center path. It means you find yourself belonging nowhere.
Even on the earth of divination, esoterica, and spirituality, I’m not “throw out the books and unconditionally belief your instinct” and I’m additionally not “give me a vetted quotation from a determine of recognizable authority or bust.” I’m not one to presume that every little thing that goes bump within the evening is a supernatural phenomenon, and I’m additionally not one to presume that there’s no such factor as supernatural phenomenon, and in reality I’m the kind who doesn’t even just like the phrase “supernatural” as a result of I think about it completely pure.
And plenty of occasions that meant it was arduous to narrate to the individuals conversing round me. I’m not rational sufficient for the rationalists, and never religious sufficient for the spiritualists. It’s humorous how the feedback part of my YouTube movies can equally accuse me of being too tutorial and never “really religious” but in addition get the accusations of being too woo and never tutorial sufficient. (I received’t get into how a white dude who decides to self-identify with Dr. is straight away assumed to be scholarly sufficient to talk authoritatively on a convention not his personal, however I converse alone custom and get badgered with, the place did you get your PhD in Japanese Philosophy from? Cite your sources, now.)
As for what I mentioned earlier about being agnostic relating to occasion traces, sure, relating to occasion traces, however no, not relating to political activism. There’s a distinction. A giant one. Truly what attracts me to Taoism is the unimaginable steerage it presents with respect to sociopolitics and political concept. The center path with respect to politics doesn’t imply you don’t decide a facet; it means you see the humanity of each side. It means social justice and public curiosity, distributed in a non-discriminatory, non-prejudicial method.
However globally we’re in a part of division proper now. We’re devoting a complete lot of time drawing traces within the sand and determining who belongs on what facet of these traces. And in the event you aren’t 100% in alignment with that facet’s ideologies, you get pushed throughout the road, however then that facet additionally realizes you aren’t in 100% alignment with their ideology both, so that you get tossed again. Therefore the sensation of belonging nowhere.
Simply as I used to be about to finish this musing right here, the hubby J introduced up a considerate perception. Maybe by being a cusp child, it’s not that I belong nowhere, however possibly, he provided, it provides me the entry to belong in all places. You simply received’t belong squarely and solely inside any single in-group. However is that so unhealthy? Isn’t that precisely why the final line of Verse 20 is, “I’m the singular, and take nourishment from the Primordial Mom”? You might be by yourself, however by no means alone, as a result of the place you actually belong is in all places — oneness with the Tao.
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